It's Here!

My IKEA bed has arrived! 

In five small boxes! 

Which could have easily fit in our SUV! 

Without even keeping the back gate open!

Thus eliminating the almost $200 in delivery fees, weeks of waiting, and a plethora of blood-pressure raising phone calls!

I wish I could quit you, IKEA.

(Shameful.)

Comments

[Megan]

IKEA may be 3 hours away from our house but for some reason my husband and I still manage to drive there at least once a month to buy something else we don't really need or have room or the money for.... ahhh God bless IKEA.

[Sarah]

I would be very careful with this bed.

I got pregnant somewhere between 3-7 days after we bought it and that was pretty much the end of ever sleeping in it.

Ours is the dark colored one, however. So maybe you're safe.

[Sue]

Very pretty, but I'm sure if I were to purchase such a bed, my shins would be black and blue from banging them on the darn thing trying to get in.
Love your books!!

[Tinsley]

That bed is so pretty. You make me want one, but my broke ass doesn't get one. Enjoy!

P.S. How's the latest novel coming???!!!!

[Jessica]

Jen-
I've been addicted to your books for the past few days. They are just fabulous!
I am moving to Belgium in a few weeks and if I find a bookclub I am inviting you.
Thanks to your books, I am now concerned about the fact that I own both some Rammstein CDs and the soundtrack to Caberet. And although I agree with 87% of what you say, I do not think 'Homer's Enemy' is the funniest episode of The Simpsons. BUT I don't know what is....the Family Guy with the Ipecac is the funniest though. Don't you think?

Jess (the other J name of the 70's)

[Traci]

Hey! That's my bed!

That's all, I just got really excited when I saw the picture. Instead of getting it delivered, Boyfriend and I rented a U-Haul, drove through NYC for the first time, from Brooklyn to Jersey to the IKEA there for this goddamn bed, and got lost on the Turnpike on the way back.

I think it's cursed.

[Dodi in Denver]

Am LOVING the new site - so much more you.

As for the Ikea... I live in Denver - so unless I want to drive to Utah I'm S.O.O.L. Green with Envy that you have that bed though. How many teeny tiny wrenches did they send with it for assembly?

Keep posting the pics. They are hilarious.

[Noelle]

I just read both of your books in one day. Can I just say that I absolutely love you? All I had to read was that you hate Rachel Ray as much as I do and I was smitten. And, I cannot even count the number of times I laughed out loud. My favorite ever line from your books? "I'm sweating like a whore on dollar days." Priceless :)

[Lilly Munster]

I had the unfortunate experience of home delivery by IKEA too. They actually sub- contract the work (I think they get their help at the zoo). Three times the merchandise had to be shipped back due to damage, once they never showed up, and finally, when delivering the sofa, said it wouldn't fit up the stairs after they were already half way up.( My previous sofa was much larger, however). My husband had to aid in positioning the sofa up the stairs and in the apartment. Oh, I almost forgot-they damaged the downstairs door frame and threw all the packing material on the side of the apartment building, which I discovered the next day. Don't waste you money or time on them.

[Deb]

Jen, big fan. Loved Bitter and almost halfway thru Bright. I'm trying not to inhale it like the other since I have to wait until next year for your new one. I swear when you write, it's like you're reading my mind. Nice bed. Gotta love those Ikea sale ads on TV these days.I do love the IKEA, but the store makes me claustrophobic every time I go and I end up running and hyperventilating towards the exit.

[Aimee]

Congrats on finally getting your bed! I went to Ikea for the first time ever in May and have to say that my daughter quite enjoyed the children's play area. I was pretty amazed...it rivaled the Neverland Club at Disney World and she didn't want to leave when I went to pick her up. I bought a lot of "little" stuff, but plan to go back when it's time to redo my little one's room. It's about 3 hours away, but my best friend lives up there (in Northern VA) and will combine shopping trip with a visit! Jen...thanks so much for continuing to blog after the success of your books...you are one of the few people in this life that can make me laugh out loud!

[Officially Cross]

Just for the record, I love both you and IKEA. I'm pretty sure that I love you more, but don't tell IKEA, I don't think that I can bear to live without either one of you!

[cha cha]

CUTE BED though!!!
Along the lines of the above comments, I was at good ol' B&N the other day to "study" since I only have about one final/wk in my master's program, and I promised myself I wouldn't read the new book until my next break between semesters...6 chapters an about 1.5 (and a chocolate cupcake!) later, I was laughing (and almost peeing) SO hard!!! Out loud! The part about the dr's visit was SO FREAKING FUNNY. I can't wait to read the rest. Any chance you can get another book out for Christmas break? :)

[elise]

Hey Jen, I just finished Bright Lights (hilarious.) You have the kind of sarcastic, wit I have always strived for. Ha.

Anyway, I cannot even tell you how freaking excited I was when, today, at work, as I sat in my office with three other people who looked at me as if I were absolutely out-of-my-mind-crazy after squealing because I discovered that you had a blog. Regular doses of hilarity to hold me over until the next book! Hooray! =)

[Jessica]

Oh, yes -- I like the drinking game idea! Make sure to take video of the carnage!

I have an Ikea that is about 25 minutes from me. What I do is I find the item I want online, make sure it's in the store, then call the Ikea hotline for the store and have them tell me what aisle and shelf it's on. I'm in and out lickety split! Just an idea for those of you who live close to the stores but find yourselves lost inside for HOURS!

[Michele]

Play a drinking game while putting it together. Everytime you curse while putting it together you take a shot.

[Sean]

I'm sure Fletch is going to have a wonderful time putting it together. And I'm sure that you will have fun sitting back watching him with a glass of wine.

[leahg]

is there storage space under that bed??

[Bonnie]

If they can deliver the bed, why can't they put it together for you?

Some stores are just pure evil.

[Lisa M]

The only way to break the Ikea habit is to move away from the store.

[Brooke]

Wait, how does a head or foot board come in a small box? Oh, I don't think I could put that together....

[Brooke]

I am thankful that I live about 5 hours from the nearest IKEA store. My husband says I buy enough questionable quality furniture from Pier 1!!

[melbearz]

Nice to see that I'm not the only one with issues regarding Swedish Quality Control. We got the wrong cross-braces for the entertainment center that we bought and drove 200 miles back to Austin from Houston, so we weren't exactly in a mood to go back and get new ones. Or wait the two weeks it would take to ship them. So we ended up going to Home Depot (while not a member of the HT, should have a Feast Day) and making our own. Which worked pretty well, I must say. At which point I think I said I would never buy from Ikea again. And then they opened one up here in Austin.

[Pattie]

Holy cow! I was going to email you about how much I enjoyed Bitter Is the New Black, how I'm going to start reading Bright Lights, Big Ass soon, and how I love that you and Fletch have a pit bull (as do I), when what do I see on your blog? My Malm bed from IKEA! I hope yours is easier to set up than ours was. Of course, IKEA forgot to give us most of the parts we'd paid for. But that's another story.