It's Like Deja Vu All Over Again*

UPDATE:

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

* * *

Today's edition of OH, HELL NO news, linked to by Jezebel.com and discovered by alert reader Kim, comes to you from the lovely underpants model/Brody Jenner paramour Cora Skinner:

Please enjoy these selections from Cora Skinner's Eight Rules for Dating

2.  I am not a great listener, although I might appear to be.  Sure, I may be nodding and saying, "Mmm hmm," but usually I'm just trying to think of a way to steer the conversation back to being about me.

8.  There will be occasions when you breathe too loudly for my liking.  Ditto on the chewing.

Funny, right? 

Yeah, that's what I thought when I wrote them.  (See Bitter Is the New Black, page 160 for a complete list of the Jen Commandments.)

However, before we go all Dick Cheney on this girl, let's give her the benefit of the doubt.  Maybe she's a nice kid and a fan and doesn't understand the legality of attributing copyrighted work.  I've pinged her on MySpace and asked her to either credit me or remove the text.

And if she doesn't, then maybe we'll have a grudge-match on pay-per-view. 

(FYI, smart money's on the fat, bitter, forty-year-old.)   

*Which is a Yogi Berra quote.  Which I mention because I don't swipe other people's words.

Comments

[Kelly]

I think a bitch needs to go down!!!

[Mz. Rodriguez]

Wow...I'm just surprised that the skank actually reads.
And not just Cosmo articles, but actual books.

[The Other Jen]

YAY! Congrats on getting it deleted. She's a skank troll. :)

[Nat]

Wow! As for the Jenner kid and the "Idiot stick with a head": Those two deserve each other. It must be so fun to exchange a different STD every night! And as for her "fatties" comment...WTF! Granted, she does live in a city where a size 2 is fat..and I'm thinking all the "not eating" is whats causing her over the top, dumbass comments. Poor girl. Beauty will only last so long..but dumbass stupidity will unfortunately last forever! And Jen, I 100% agree with Hilary's post. I highly doubt she read your book. I think she had someone type in her blog, while she would blurt out bullshit. Either way YOU deserve credit so go after her scrawny ass!

[Nat]

Wow! As for the Jenner kid and the "Idiot stick with a head": Those two deserve each other. It must be so fun to exchange a different STD every night! And as for her "fatties" comment...WTF! Granted, she does live in a city where a size 2 is fat..and I'm thinking all the "not eating" is whats causing her over the top, dumbass comments. Poor girl. Beauty will only last so long..but dumbass stupidity will unfortunately last forever! And Jen, I 100% agree with Hilary's post. I highly doubt she read your book. I think she had someone type in her blog, while she would blurt out bullshit. Either way YOU deserve credit so go after her scrawny ass!

[Melissa]

Hey Jen,

Did you try reporting her to MySpace for copyright violation? There's a page here:
http://www.myspace.com/Modules/Help/Pages/HelpCenter.aspx?Category=3&Question=31
that tells you what you need to do.

[Karina in T.O]

Ah man, I'm getting a visual here....

(que the instramental music!) A big gaggle of women (all co-ordinated in Lacoste attire in either a pink or green , with large yet tasteful pearls, and cute yet functional pumps) at the bottom of a hill on a dark and stormy night. Every woman has either a club, pitchfork, hammer or God forbid, the Canadian contingant..we've got hockey sticks!

As we claw our way up the hill en masse through the gusts of wind (read hot air) coming from the mansion of Cora (I'm living off my parents cash)Skinner, as we make quick work of the gates protecting the property and proceed to trample the outlandish landscaping so lovingly pruned by her minimum wage Mexican gardner.......

Who's with me on the angry, but well manicured mob going after this Cora freak?

[cori]

I'm curious- does it bug you that someone that stupid likes your book or are you just glad that a lot of different people like it?? I think I would be torn on that one.

[hilary]

Is anyone else amazed that she seems to have read the book? Surely that can't be the case....but surely she can't have a friend cool enough, or smart enough, to have read the book, and told her about it...so confused..

Regardless, go get her Jen. That's bull.

[cori]

I'm curious- does it bug you that someone that stupid likes your book or are you just glad that a lot of different people like it?? I think I would be torn on that one.

[Becca]

I just wrote a letter to Jack Ryan and the editor at the Post Chronicle to add to their awareness of her plagiarism. Why not make as many people aware of her big mistake? Keep us posted on the actions you are taking. As someone who majored in journalism, I have no tolerance of unoriginal people who steal...and are models. Ugh!

Let us know how we can get the word out. I will write to anyone who will expose the truth and make this girl look like the dumb hooker that she is.

Nice try, Miss Skinner, but you just made a lot of intelligent, proactive women angry.

[blu_canary]

"Ok, so I checked the wannabe somebody's blog to see Ms. Skinner's ripped-off post and she seems to have changed number 8[...]but number 2 is still the same."

But look at #3!! Does she think everyone is as dumb as she is and by switching the numbers around it will confuse us?! Ok, that's just too much.... Should I stock up on torches and pitchforks yet?

[Molly]

I know what your fourth book can be about...

[DK]

Models can read? Huh. I learned something today.

[Rebecca]

OH HELL NO! Take the bitch out!

[The Modern Gal]

Jen! Thank of all the free publicity you'd get! Expose, expose!

[Liz]

"hit her hard and make her cry" - a stolen quote from Jillian Michaels from Biggest Loser

go get her

[Kasey]

Before I begin, I have to say to Erin: When I read "you know we're on that Biznatch like the letter G on a knockoff Coach bag" I died laughing (and was really glad to finish my gulp of wine before finishing your post!)....it was awesome! Ok, on to the comment.

Ok, so I checked the wannabe somebody's blog to see Ms. Skinner's ripped-off post and she seems to have changed number 8 to: "I enjoy moving to a new place every six months. You should enjoy carrying heavy furniture." but number 2 is still the same.

I'm not sure if this is in response to Jen writing her but I say you (Jen) should go after her. I agree with all the posts above after seeing her disrespect of acknowledging your wit.

[Michelle]

You are part Italian, yes? Cut her :o)

Ciao baby,
Michelle

[Kelli]

Ok, correct me if I am wrong here, but in addition to the disgusting plagarism already mentioned, didn't she also steal the bit about moving and carrying heavy things? I distictly remember that in Bitter as well, yes?

[Gatorlovergirl]

Get her Jen...and make it hurt!!!! My money is on you!

[Kristabella]

Go after her ass.

And tell her that Brody belongs with Lauren anyway.

[Erin]

I'm so with Tami. May I direct the court's attention to the 'Alyssa Situation'? Your fans reduced the girl to tears and pleas with you to stop the insanity. And at least she was decently well-written! Give us the word, Jen, and you know we're on that Biznatch like the letter G on a knockoff Coach bag. Your fans versus her 'fans'? Well yours are funny, articulate, and out for justice in the world against pea-brained snobs like her. Her fans watch The Hills for more than just the comedic value, consider themselves 'celebrities' if they're f*ing, flashing, or throwing up on the right person, or are too busy with the tube sock and the bottle of lotion to do anything. I rest my case.

[kristin Kaminski]

oh, and one more thing...ON THE BRIGHT SIDE...
A. she can read
B. you KNOW you're a famous author once you've officially been plaigerized!!

yay you!

[Elizabeth]

I can see it now:

"Your honor, my client couldn't possibly be guilty of plagerism. She is completely illiterate and lacks any cognitive brain function."

I love your approach and gleefully await going "Dick Cheney" on her!

[kristin Kaminski]

see, what you MUST do is make a little call to the person who WROTE that article and expose her as a total fraud. the TEN commandments! original...on every angle.

[Gina B.]

In the immortal words of Whitney Houston: "Hell to the no!"

I have a personal problem with a) stupid people, and 2) people who don't think that anyone else is going to realize their stupidity.

[Tracy]

Go get her Jen... stealing bitch.

[Rosalind]

Ok, bitch who wrote this: "Don't be a hater, fatties," "Watch for me on VH1's Celebrity Sex Life Special, Jan 23. I'll be modeling lingerie that Britney Spears bought. (but in a smaller size.)" She needs to be taken out. TAKEN OUT. A chick like this is using your sacred satire words to make herself look cool. IF you do not legally SMACK her, people will mistake her for having a brain and a wit, to boot. And YOU will be responsible for this. And I cannot have that. I know many lawyers if one will not be provided for you by your publisher...

[Nanz]

Wow! It's one thing to plagiarize on a crappy little MySpace page but now that she's "published" I think its time to school this bitch on what the little "C" with a circle around it really means.

[tutugirl1345]

You should totally arrange a beat down. We'll all be your backup. If not, I know several writing professors who'd probably love to smother her in her sleep for that one :)

[Amy]

She should so go down for doing that and I read some of her other things, can we say stuck on ourself....I hope you get her!

[michelle]

Nail her Jen, Nail her and can I quote you?? Get the C U Next Tuesday now!!!!!!

[Kate]

The skank must be taken down. She's hot but probably cant write a complete sentence.

Strike her down Jen!!!

Can't wait to meet you in Chicago!

[sweetney]

re: the update: you need to contact them and let them know she's a plagiarizer, man. that's fuckin' WRONG.

[Rebecca]

Let her have it, Jen. Take her down.

Because, TO QUOTE YOU..."Oh, hell, no!!!"

[kalisa]

what a fucking loser. Take her down. She doesn't deserve to even read your stuff, much less steal it. She obviously gets away with TOO MUCH in her life as it is. Don't give her this freebie.

[Tami]

I say we just go into her MySpace and let her have it...a group take down! Just give the word and we'll GO! Of course, if you're hoping to sneak up on the bimbo with legal voodoo...we'll wait!

[Karina in T.O]

Hello??!! I'm voting for going all Sicilian on her skinny ass and cutting her off at the knees, not that I'd ever advocate violence against the stupid, but wow, I can't belive this vapid, mental mutant would even dare....

And now that I think of it, since when is any girl that's shagging Brody "I'll never have a legit job" Jenner think it appropriate to give any kind of dating advice to the masses??? Ugh! She should be giving advice on where the best free clinics are!

[Lisa Ann]

I'm sorry, but I just have to comment about this again. Take the bitch down. It takes a ton of work to blog - even more if you do it professionally and the fact that she blatantly plagiarized is just chapping my @$$. She offers nothing more than a vapid waist of space that is taken up by a fluke in the genetic lottery. Personally anyone who's only claim to fame is that she is screwing some guy on the D-List and has to take her clothes off to make an impression is low on my "Oh Please Reproduce" scale.
Again, I am sorry for double posting but I spent five hours working on my last post and that was just the editing (& I don't get paid nor am I a professional writer) and this just pisses me off to no end.

[Little Miss Detroit]

I like where she requests that she wishes someone would shot (sic) Tyra Banks. Not that I'm hardcore Tyra or anything, but "shot" her? Please. And who are you to denounce a successful supermodel, Ms. I Wear Panties For A Living?

[Jane]

Who the F is Cora Skinner? She's a hag that's semi-famous for dating a D lister, oh hell, Z lister......

And she rips off the Jenn comandments.....

Hell to the NO!

[Squeaky Wheel]

Skin her alive, Jen. Two reasons:

1. It's not nearly as funny coming from someone with a MySpace photo like THAT ("hey, i'm perfect, and i'm a bitch, too!")

2. It's blatant plagiarism, word-for-word, with no credit. In research, it can get you stripped of your credentials. In law, it can get you disbarred. Here? She should at least have to cry and mess up her mascara. Oh, and pay you a lot of money.

[Melissa]

I'm guessing that there was already another cease and desist against part of this plagiarized piece. When it ran at postchronicle.com, it was "The Ten Commandments of Cora Skinner."

[Jenny]

Poor stupid little girl doesn't even know what she's gotten herself into... all she had to do was include a little note that said "these words were originally written by someone MUCH smarter (and funnier! and classier!) than I."

[Heide]

Take her down... I can't wait to see her cry.

[Kari]

Everytime someone asks me what an asshat is I say "Ask Jen." They look at me a little funny until I go into the whole story about the day I discovered your first book. Long live Jen!

P.S. Take her down most definitely!

[Suzy]

Take her down. Hard. Her last one is also very similar with her "you should enjoy moving furniture"

Jay Leno just won a lawsuit against Judy Brown, a woman who wrote 19 books off other people's jokes. She had to pay out hundreds of thousands of dollars. And in the book, she attributed the jokes to the right owners but didn't ask for permission!!

My attorney told me the fastest field of lawsuits is in IP work, mainly because of the web.

[sweetney]

OH HELLS NO is right!

"Maybe she's a nice kid and a fan and doesn't understand the legality of attributing copyrighted work."

dude, you are a fucking SAINT. PLEASE let us know what you hear back!

[Beth]

If you do take Skank-o-rama to court, I'm sure that would give you fodder for another book!