I never hear the word "splendid" anymore and that's a damn shame because it's such an evocative term. "Splendid" is one of the best words to use in setting a mood and I have no idea why it's gone out of style.
For example, as the ability to make polite small talk completely alludes me, I'm only going to bother to ask you how your weekend was when I actually care about your response. So when you reply with a bullshit throw-away term like "good" or "fine," I have no clue as to the quality of your Saturday or Sunday and it bothers me.
Does saying your weekend was "fine" mean you went out for a lovely dinner and you found three pairs of Via Spigas marked down to nothing at Nordstrom Rack and when you got home you watched Matt Damon movies on the big screen while eating a Barcelona bar?
Or was your weekend "good," which could very well imply the highlight was when you chased hipsters off your lawn with the same shovel you'd used to address Mt. Doody in the backyard hours earlier?
Who can tell? Certainly not me.
But if you were to reply, "Jen, my weekend was splendid!" then the movies and candy and shoes would be implied and I'd be happy for you.
Oh, splendid... splendid... where for art thou, splendid? Did that fake sugar steal all your thunder? Or have you been going the of the dinosaur because kids have no idea how to shorten "splendid" into LolcatTextySpeak?
Well, listen up, splendid - I'm not going to let you go quietly into that goodnight. I pledge to help preserve your legacy in print. I promise to use you when I write my next book.
And you know what?
This might be an appropriate place to mention the announcement that came out in Publisher's Weekly today:
Blogger Jen Lancaster (jennsylvania.com) has made a deal with Kara Cesare at NAL for a fourth memoir, Pretty in Plaid, via Kate Garrick at DeFiore & Co. Since 2006, Lancaster has published one book a year with NAL; the first two, Bitter Is the New Black and Bright Lights, Big Ass have almost 200,000 copies in print. Her third memoir, Such a Pretty Fat, hits stores this May. Pub date for Pretty, to be the prequel to Bitter, is summer 2009.
I've been telling people Pretty in Plaid is a memoir about being a socially awkward 'tween, privately summing it up as The Book in Which I Go David Sedaris All Over Your Asses - but the Publisher's Weekly description is nice, too...
Possibly even splendid.
Jennsylvania, effectively burying the lede since 2005.
I'm so excited for this fourth book! P.S. My weekend was fabulous because I finished Bitter is the New Black and it was phenomenal!
Posted by: Alex | March 03, 2008 at 11:06 AM
Shut UP a new book??? I don't know what to do with myself this really IS splendid! I wish we could just fast forward however long it's going to be until it comes out so I can take it with me everywhere and have passers-by wonder what my deal is when I start openly laughing in public for no apparent reason. Again. Yay!
And there are worse things than "going all David Sedaris-y" so until then I'll be waiting with bated breath.
Posted by: Jeannine | March 03, 2008 at 11:06 AM
That news just made my day absolutely SPLENDIFEROUS! (I have a thing for taking one fabu adjective and modifying it just enough to make me laugh and to annoy my friends - give it a whirl! ;))
Posted by: Anna | March 03, 2008 at 10:56 AM
Wow, congratulations! I've already pre-ordered Such a Pretty Fat and now we'll be stalking Amazon for your next one.
Posted by: Liz | March 03, 2008 at 10:43 AM
You just made my day. Now I can appropriately use the word "splendid" when I am asked how I am doing.
Posted by: Sister Honey Bunch | March 03, 2008 at 10:41 AM
That is TERRIFIC! (this is also a SPLENDID word that I have been campaigning to comeback in vogue - note must be said with gusto)
Posted by: Mrs PBS | March 03, 2008 at 10:31 AM
Your fourth book sounds SPLENDID indeed!
Looking forward to reading about your experience growing up around the same part of Indiana around the same time as myself.
Posted by: Jennifer | March 03, 2008 at 10:15 AM
Lovely. That's my favorite underused word. If you use "lovely" a few times today I will use "splendid" a time or two and together we will make the world a better sounding place.
Posted by: Shelli | March 03, 2008 at 10:12 AM
Yeah Jen! That's splendid that you have another book in the works! I can't wait until May when #3 comes out!
Posted by: Steph | March 03, 2008 at 10:10 AM
OMG Jen! A fourth book???? THAT'S SPLENDID! I'm very excited about this latest news seeing as how my work day is not so splendid -- thanks for making it more happy :)
Thanks for merely existing and injecting humor into my life! Keep on writin'!!!!
Posted by: Alyssa | March 03, 2008 at 10:09 AM
Congratulations! Eagerly anticipating each splendid book!
Posted by: julie | March 03, 2008 at 10:09 AM
Congratulations, Jen! What splendid news! I also like to use the more whimsical, "splendiforous" if I'm feeling saucy. Can't wait for both upcoming books.
Posted by: kim | March 03, 2008 at 10:04 AM
HOORAY!!! ANOTHER BOOK! The third one isnt even out yet but I'm already excited about your fourth! Keep writing Jen-you always make me laugh, even when Im not having a "splendid" day.
Posted by: Meghan | March 03, 2008 at 09:59 AM