Such A Pretty Who?

This morning, I imagine thousands of intellectuals are opening The Paper of Record to peruse the book review section, as they do every Sunday.  I can picture them sipping gourmet coffee in their well-appointed living rooms, scanning the best seller pages and nodding in tacit agreement as they recall why they loved each of the listed books so much.

"Gilbert's Eat, Pray, Love is a spiritual awakening!" 

"Grogan's Marley and Me is just heartbreakingly uplifting!"

"The Audacity of Hope by the future President Obama - what an inspiration!"

"The God Delusion - that Dawkins is so thought-provoking!"

"McCullough's John Adams proves what a visionary he was, while still being human and accessible!"

"Walls is very brave to share her story in The Glass Castle!"

Then they get to the book making its debut at number twenty on the list.

"Such A Pretty... um, wait a second... who the hell is Jen Lancaster?"

For those who've never heard of me, I'm a fat chick with high self esteem who wrote a book about being a fat chick with high self-esteem.  The book ends with me being slightly less fat and slightly more healthy (with the same amount of self-esteem.)

And no, I don't build schools in rural Afghanistan or leave behind the shackles of man to live in the wilderness, nor do I offer an intricate study of social epidemics or describe the experience of dying and crossing over to the other side.

But I do write about accidentally getting high on Ambien and ordering a Barbie head on the internet. 

So there's that.

"Frankly, we're as surprised about all of this as you are."

Comments

[JennC]

Congratulations, Jen! You totally deserve it, BTW. I loved SAPF so much that I had it half read at work after I bought it over my lunch hour. Can't wait for the next one!

[Christine]

Congrats Jen! You totally deserve it. All your books rock. I was thrilled to meet you in Philly. When you read about the yoga workout/UPS delivery man - that was icing on the cupcake -
I had that page marked. You are so effen funny. I read Bitter (again) b4 I read SAPF, then Bright Lights (again) and now on to SAPF AGAIN! I'm telling everyone I know to buy SAPF. First b/c it is awesome, and second, b/c I am no way leading out my SIGNED copy. yeah I'm a wine drinking bitch.
Keep writing!!!

[MazingAmy]

"New York Times Best Selling Author Jen Lancaster"

YEAH!!! WOO HOO, SQUEEEEEEEEEE, SNAP and all that my friend!!!! You DESERVE this so much!!!!!!!

[iamlandlocked]

It's a big week for me. Not only do I get to see the SATC movie on opening night (at a theatre that serves wine at the concession stand!!!), I get to make my annual Memorial Day Weekend trek to Barnes & Noble to start my summer reading marathon. Of course, SAPF will be the first book of the season.

I am currently on the breakup diet, which while very effective (I've gone from a size 14 to almost an 8 in two months), is not recommended. The only up side: unlimited liquor.

Congrats! You deserve it!

P.S. I think your books should come, like some pharmaceuticals, with a black box warning: "Serious side effects include loss of bladder control and explosive emission of beverages through the nasal opening."

[Rosalind]

I think this Officially means you get to print New York Times Bestseller on your covers.
I might be wrong. But you might want to check on that.
And the world needs more Ambien munching Barbie ebayers in print, frankly.

[Alison in Oregon]

You say "But I do write about accidentally getting high on Ambien and ordering a Barbie head on the internet" as if its a bad thing. Recognizing that laughter is the best medicine, you've made a medical breakthrough!

Great seeing you @ Powell's Books in Portland. Hope you enjoyed your visit!

[Lisa]

Hi Jen!

My cool red-headed friend Kim asked you to sign FOUR books for her last week in San Francisco. One of those books was for me, her friend that had shoulder surgery. I'm doing great and literally inhaled "Such A Pretty Fat" while simultaneously balancing a double NF latte on my knee and pulling off white fluffs of kitten hair that are so drawn to the velcro on my arm sling.

You are a funny, funny girl!

[Mandy]

No surprise here. I love all 3 books. Keep it up!

[Wendy]

How much do you want for the Barbie Head?

[patricia]

congratulations! on the book i mean, not the accidental barbie head shopping. though, hey, if that makes you happy, who am i to judge? :D really enjoyed the book. i had a total stranger ask me about it and i'm hoping she ran straight to the store to buy it. can't really know if she did because i chose to make my haircut appt. instead of stalking her. sorry. i know. i suck as a fan(atic). i promise to do better for the next book.

[dodim]

Yea for you!

I have read SAPF now twice - and just love it! What is so fun is that I remember you blogging some of that stuff when it was happening - which is pretty cool.

Except is it creepy that we all feel like your friends now?

Keep writing. You are very talented, and I will always pre-order for Jen Lancaster!

[dodim]

Yea for you!

I have read SAPF now twice - and just love it! What is so fun is that I remember you blogging some of that stuff when it was happening - which is pretty cool.

Except is it creepy that we all feel like your friends now?

Keep writing. You are very talented, and I will always pre-order for Jen Lancaster!

[Kelly]

Dude, I am not surprised at all. I am not a reader. I just don't have the time or the energy to read. BUT a friend suggested I read your books, especially since this new one was just about to come out. So, I started 'Bitter' and I couldn't put it down. I am telling you...I have three kids and I ignored them for an entire day while Sponge Bob babysat. Then, I made a deal with myself. I could only read your book while I was on the elliptical at the gym. SO, check this out. I worked out for an hour on the elliptical (level 9, thankyouverymuch) EVERY WEEKDAY for 3 weeks and finished the last two. I also lost 15 pounds (go me!). But now I will gain it back unless I find more books that make me laugh my ass off as much as yours. Got any recommendations? My fat is not quite at pretty as yours =0)

[sarah]

YAY for the Barbie head!!!

Congrats!!

I just finished all three books; not sure why it took me so long to find Bitter, but I've pretty much inhaled the books in record time (at least for me, given the toddler, the husband and preparing for a cross-country move). I have to say, I am flat out SAD that they're done and I have no more Jen Lancaster books to read until you write ANOTHER memoir.

So for now I just go around telling everyone who makes eye contact with me that they HAVE to read your books.

Thanks for the inspiration--I've never lost a high-profile corporate job (or had one, for that matter), or lived in Chicago (DC is small beans in comparison, I think), BUT, I have been the fat girl (wait, I am the fat girl), and "Such a Pretty Fat" has been really inspiring to me because of it's honesty and humor. It was the kick in the ass I needed, and here I sit, post-run and probably sweatier than I should be while sitting on my couch.

So thanks so much and PLEASE get to work on your next book ASAP! :-)

[sarah]

YAY for the Barbie head!!!

Congrats!!

I just finished all three books; not sure why it took me so long to find Bitter, but I've pretty much inhaled the books in record time (at least for me, given the toddler, the husband and preparing for a cross-country move). I have to say, I am flat out SAD that they're done and I have no more Jen Lancaster books to read until you write ANOTHER memoir.

So for now I just go around telling everyone who makes eye contact with me that they HAVE to read your books.

Thanks for the inspiration--I've never lost a high-profile corporate job (or had one, for that matter), or lived in Chicago (DC is small beans in comparison, I think), BUT, I have been the fat girl (wait, I am the fat girl), and "Such a Pretty Fat" has been really inspiring to me because of it's honesty and humor. It was the kick in the ass I needed, and here I sit, post-run and probably sweatier than I should be while sitting on my couch.

So thanks so much and PLEASE get to work on your next book ASAP! :-)

[sarah]

YAY for the Barbie head!!!

Congrats!!

I just finished all three books; not sure why it took me so long to find Bitter, but I've pretty much inhaled the books in record time (at least for me, given the toddler, the husband and preparing for a cross-country move). I have to say, I am flat out SAD that they're done and I have no more Jen Lancaster books to read until you write ANOTHER memoir.

So for now I just go around telling everyone who makes eye contact with me that they HAVE to read your books.

Thanks for the inspiration--I've never lost a high-profile corporate job (or had one, for that matter), or lived in Chicago (DC is small beans in comparison, I think), BUT, I have been the fat girl (wait, I am the fat girl), and "Such a Pretty Fat" has been really inspiring to me because of it's honesty and humor. It was the kick in the ass I needed, and here I sit, post-run and probably sweatier than I should be while sitting on my couch.

So thanks so much and PLEASE get to work on your next book ASAP! :-)

[sarah]

YAY for the Barbie head!!!

Congrats!!

I just finished all three books; not sure why it took me so long to find Bitter, but I've pretty much inhaled the books in record time (at least for me, given the toddler, the husband and preparing for a cross-country move). I have to say, I am flat out SAD that they're done and I have no more Jen Lancaster books to read until you write ANOTHER memoir.

So for now I just go around telling everyone who makes eye contact with me that they HAVE to read your books.

Thanks for the inspiration--I've never lost a high-profile corporate job (or had one, for that matter), or lived in Chicago (DC is small beans in comparison, I think), BUT, I have been the fat girl (wait, I am the fat girl), and "Such a Pretty Fat" has been really inspiring to me because of it's honesty and humor. It was the kick in the ass I needed, and here I sit, post-run and probably sweatier than I should be while sitting on my couch.

So thanks so much and PLEASE get to work on your next book ASAP! :-)

[Erica]

I took my daughter to the book signing in Chicago, just for company, and she bacame a fan after hearing you read. I've had to get second copies of everything. You deserve the list.

[Grace]

Congratulations Jen! I’m not the least bit surprised that Such a Pretty Fat is doing so well, it’s terrific! I loved, loved, loved it. I was at the San Francisco signing last Wednesday where you signed my books. Your book signing/reading was fantastic and it was great to see you live and in person, thank you again.

I read your books out of order as I started with Bright Lights, Big Ass and only just finished Bitter last night, which I loved, loved, loved too! I am going through the fun of job-hunting, resume tweaking, checking the mailbox daily for that unemployment check, etc., and the whole message of getting your priorities straight as well as the general horror of looking at all crap I have foolishly purchased really hit home. Talk about feeling like someone understands me. I really do admire how you were able to persevere through your layoff. Lord, what some of those companies put you through in the interviewing process, as well as what that Courtney person did should be a crime. Bitter really couldn’t have come along at a better time for me. You really are an inspiration because now when I start to get down I will remember you and ask myself “What would Jen do?” Thank you so much for that.

And I can’t wait for Pretty in Plaid.

Grace

[dcfullest]

I just finished the book 5 minutes ago. I swear the line "its like expecting a suprise party and getting a surprise pap smear instead" to be the funniest thing ever written. That whole chapter made me wet my pants laughing out loud.

BTW- I saw you read in Northern Virginia and your dress was super cute. I got there a little late and watched a store clerk pushing around a stack of your books muttering "oh shit, we didn't get her to sign enough copies!"

[Vanessa]

Huge Congratulations to you! Do you feel like you have arrived? ;)

[kalisah]

Congrats on cracking The List. You totally deserve it & I can't wait to read the new one. New folks here don't know what they've been missing.

[Kim]

Hi Jen...I met you Thursday night in Oakland and the first thing I thought when I saw you? Wow! She is REALLY beautiful! Of course, then you talked about your Botox and Restylane and now I hate you (you evil cheater!). But seriously, you were so pretty in person and so much nicer than I expected. You were super funny and even my boyfriend thought you were great! Thank you for your great writing tips. I am totally going to kick myself in the butt and start writing every day. Can't wait to read "Pretty in Plaid." I, too, am mad for plaid!

[Alli T]

Ha! I just checked the NY Times and you're at number 14, not 20!! And you're almost at 13 as the "asterisk (*) indicates that a book’s sales are barely distinguishable from those of the book above." And SAPF has one of those beautiful little marks next to it. CONGRATS!!

[Jen Z.]

Okay, so now that I've almost finished your newest book (could have this morning but am enjoying so much I don't want it to end) I've made my first visit to Jennsylvania. I was planning to shower and go out into the world today--run errands, visit my local bookstore, experience daylight and fresh air--but it's now 1:30 in the afternoon EST, I'm still in my PJs and can't stop reading and laughing at your postings (plus the clever comments from your many fans). How could I not have made a trip to Jennsylvania before?!? Now I can finish off SAPF safe in the knowledge that your blog will be there to keep me going until your next book (no pressure), and I can always reread your first two books. Like many of my favorite TV programs I'm sure they get better each time you watch/read them. Fresh air is overrated; I guess I'll just open some windows and keep reading.

[tutugirl1345]

Congratulations! You totally deserve it! And you shouldn't be shocked.

[Amanda]

I am currently on my second reading of this book! Despite my doctors warnings to change my eating habits while in college, and telling me I need to lose the 30 extra pounds I have gained since graduating high school (yeah, the freshman 15 hit me twice) this book has been the only thing to inspire me to get my (growing) ass off the couch and change my eating habits. Since I got your book last week I started working out and eating better. I am already seeing results and believe it is mostly from the grueling ab work out from reading your books and laughing so hard I literally cramp up and wheeze like a beached whale.

[joycelyn]

I read "BLBA" in the breakroom at work, I ended up reading it aloud to a couple people as I would start giggling and they had to know what was so funny. (I work at home depot and most of the people in the breakroom were men and they were cracking up) I am thrilled you are getting the recognition you so richly deserve.
Joycelyn

[Nosaby]

I'm reading it now!! So funny. Of course I've already read your other two. You might even be inspiring me to get up off the couch and start moving. As soon as I finish my chocolate croissant that is.

[Stephanie]

Congrats! I don't know that you intended it, but SAPF was actually an inspiration to me and I've now started looking for ways to get myself healthy and have fun while I do it.

[Kristin]

Congratulations Jen! You absolutely deserve to be on every bestseller list!

I spent my honeymoon last year laughing at Bitter on the beach. My husband eventually stopped asking me what I was laughing at every five minutes. I was thrilled to find Bright Lights when I got home and quickly devoured it laughing histerically the whole way. With my signed copy of Such a Pretty Fat (from your Chicago signing), I decided that while I was happy with how I looked (in shape as far as my friends were concerned), I didn't like getting winded walking up the stairs to work each morning. I joined a gym and used SAPF as my motivation to actually go to the gym. No reading unless I was at the gym! I enjoyed SAPF during each visit (finished it in 4 trips) and found myself shooting dirty looks at people who couldn't understand why I was laughing out loud on the treadmill.

Here's to a trip to the top for SAPF!

[Penny]

WOOHOOOOOO!!!! CONGRATS!!!! Have to tell you....I have your book in a SEALED bag - my kids bought it for me for Mother's Day and told me I had to save it for our annual trek to Hilton Head in mid-June. I AM COUNTING THE DAYS (and warned them they will be buried in the sand w/impending waves approaching if they don't leave me ALONE to read your books!!!) It was last year that I "discovered" you while in Hilton Head and made an ass out of myself at the pool to the point where the kids would actually tell people, "She's just spending time w/her new best friend, Jen!" This year, I'm reading at the BEACH so no one will make fun of me spewing out Diet soda while trying not to pee as I laugh w/you. CAN'T WAIT!!! XXOO

[Nicole]

HA, what are the pets doing in the background? Totally made my morning!

[SanKaye]

Congrats, Jen! You deserve this honor because SAPF is a FABULOUS book. I loved every word.

[kaity]

I am not surprised at all! I was feeling jen withdrawal after finishing such a pretty fat that i reread bitter! you are a FABBB writer! keep writing and we'll keep buying! stay amazing (not that i have any doubt that you won't)!!

[Mary]

Holy Crap - you are so f'ing funny - thanks for making me laugh out loud to the point of coughing out a lung on a Sun Morning...
Mary