The Correct Answer Is D

Hey, how about a little something for the laaaydiees?

So, what do you think Fletch is about to do while clad in this tool belt and hundreds of dollars of power tools? 

Is he:

A)  Adding a solarium onto the house?

B)  Installing a roof deck or possibly an entire third floor?

C)  Rehabbing the master bathroom?

D)  Placing two tiny screws in the wall to hang a curtain rod (which I totally could have done myself except he gets all stabby when he sees me try to build stuff with roofing nails and the heel of my loafer?)

And yes... I know.  I haven't posted anything for a week and the best thing I can think to put up is a photo of my husband's narrow ass?

You're welcome.

UPDATE:  So I decided I was perfectly capable of putting the curtain tie-back up myself.  I even used the big girl screwdriver. 

And it was totally fine.

Until I placed the filial finial (spellcheck doesn't correct it when you spell the wrong word the right way) on the end of it.

I may owe a certain flat-assed someone an apology.

Comments

[JLKelly]

I just want to say that I've read your latest book and your second one, Bright Lights, and girl, you are so friggin funny! You're funnier than Marian Keyes! I almost wet myself I was laughing so hard. My husband had to switch rooms because I kept shaking the bed with laughter! You're awesome!

[Karmen A in the MN]

My husband paid a guy $50 to come and hang a $10 towel bar in our bathroom! Had I known he was putting the job out for bids I would have done it for $25.
It was fun to see you in MN. You are way prettier in person that your pics on here. Love your books and have been responsible for selling at least a dozen of them to various friends and family. Hopefully that $12 you earned off of me and my BFFs will go toward getting Fletch a new tool or something.

[christi]

Good for Fletch! My hubby just talks about projects that never get done...we'd live in the Taj Mahal if he did half the stuff he's talked about. Case in point? My baby's room is a bedroom/office, even though he promised to convert our garage before he was born. Our baby? Is THREE.

[blu_canary]

Love SAPF, that's just a given.

But wanted to tell you that I bought a lovely PINK drill and it works ever so much better than my shoes, cutlery, etc. The bonus? The hubby won't touch it because it is pink. I also purchased a set of pink floral handled tools (hammer, screwdrivers, tape measure) and I never have to hunt for them because they are all in my pink tool box.

Even when he can't find his stuff, he won't touch mine! Whoo hoo!

[blackbird]

Fletch's tool belt is definitely bigger than K's.

My crush continues.

[Joanna]

You are the best thing to happen to my life since I perfected my spinach and artichoke dip. :-)

My husband wants to build a coffee table. But we have no power tools. Or table saws. And he can't even hang curtain rods.

[Michelle BB]

I cringe when my husband wants to take on any home improvement project (including the hanging of a picture). It takes him 3x as long to do a job than it would take anyone else; he's just not handy.

I dread the pulling out of the toolbox. Dread.

[LJ]

What I want to know is how is he able to walk with that bulky thing on?!?

[Sheri]

You're lucky - at least Fletch owns all these tools - that is soooo something my husband would have hired out. He just paid our lawn service guy $300 to put down new bark. Really? Is that NOT something we can do? Seriously, he's on handyman notice.

[stephani]

What is it about men that makes them break out thousands of dollars of DeWalt and Makita tools to do a 10 second job that needs nothing more than a hammer and some nails? Must be that whole Y chromosome thing.

[rachel]

Love that he gets all 'fixed up' just to screw in two tiny screws. That is too cute.

I read 'Such A Pretty Fat' Friday and I want to come be your friend. I loved it. It's fabulous!

[The Modern Gal]

I totally want that tool belt.

[Krystyn]

Hey, it's a pretty good looking hiney...so we forgive you for not posting more often. And, while it is overkill in the tool department, at least he is fixing it!

[tutugirl1345]

This is the greatest start to my week.

[Heather]

The tool belt? Is bigger than Fletch....

[Kate]

My husband would totally do this. When we got married he had a "man shower" so he could get tools, beer, a grill, etc.

They all have tool envy.

I'd use my shoes, but I'd worry I'd ruin a heel, or leave a shoe print on the wall. (both I've done before)

[Rhonda]

Ahh, the memories that holds for me...

Once upon a time my husband looked like that as he ripped apart our ensuite. And it stayed like that for well over a year. Even though it was a "piece of cake" to finish, somehow it never did. Until I convinced him (i.e. had temper tantrum) and hired someone to finish off what he had started.

Toolbelts be gone!

[margalit]

Mmmmmm, nice tushy! Nothing like a man with BIG TOOLS. heh. You never know when you might need a huge drill to hang up a curtain rod. So manly. Now give the man a nice big glass of wine.

[Chris]

My grandmother (sorry, no husband yet) has a toolbox in her closet.... under 16 random containers. Luckily we don't use it often, but when we do it's very difficult to get a hold of =/

[Twenty Four At Heart]

Nice ass!

[Soren]

Kelly's comments are spot on! And to everyone who had all the tools they needed before their men walked in, YES!!! totally!
My hubby and I BOTH get all stabby when working together (or cooking together, or shopping together)... you get the idea... we're all chefs, no busboys, you know? (loooove you honey! :D )

Jen-- at least Fletch puts on a tool belt and has places for stuff-- my husband comes up from the basement with a whack of drywall screws IN HIS MOUTH and proceeds to NOT use the ladder but stands on my vanity set stool (wobble much?) and work on a ceiling fan.
without.
cutting.
the power.
and yet-- no trips to the emergency room (thus far).

Does anyone else lay odds on how many trips it will take to Home Depot to complete a project? We put in an IKEA closet system last labor day weekend-- 3 trips to IKEA and 5 to home depot!

[la güera]

All I can say, is be grateful you don't have to worry about spackling any plumber's cracks!

[Amy]

hey! I hear you're heading my way this week???

[terryo]

My husband had tool box envy when I moved in. Best present I ever got him (his opinion?) - a new industrial tool box.

How often we really have occasion for it? rarely.

How often does he pull it out?
all the time.

[Stacy]

If you had a sitcom...I'd totally tivo it!!

[Jen on the Edge]

So he seriously straps all that on just to hang a curtain rod? Myself, I would have probably just used a butter knife if they were flathead screws and just left the rod on the floor by the window if they were Phillips head screws.

[saneandsingle]

So I'm not the only one to use a heel for a hammer?

[AJMick]

Oh Geez! I swear mine had absolutely no interest in tools or home repair/improvement until I moved in and he realized I had more/better tools than him. Now he's all "Ahem, excuse me little lady, while I do some fixin".

How did I ever survive to 35 without him?

[Natalie]

This is hilarious.

[Heidi]

Whoo hoo, looking good, Fletch! Nothing makes a woman swoon more than a man clad in tools! ;)

Also, just wanted to say how great it was meeting you in Minnesota and that your new book is freaking hilarious!

[Kelly]

I think next time he starts a project you should climb up next to him clad in a tool belt with 2 penny loafers hanging off it and ask him "So, what are you thinking? I'm thinking its a job thats going to require the power of the standard brown loafer." Then start pounding away next to him.