I'm Working on a Real Post, But This Had to Be Said First

Dear Bank of America,

I hope you slide under a gas truck and die tasting your own blood.

Best,

Jen

P.S.  And yes, this IS about being charged $105 in fees for Fletch's three trips to Starbucks last Friday because you chose to hold his direct deposit until Monday.  The salted caramel hot chocolates are good, but they're not that fucking good.

P.P.S.  Don't even get me started about how you held my last book check for TEN business days or I swear I will find the nearest bell tower.

Comments

[Cindy]

SO TRUE! I just paid my boyfriends and my BOA credit card bill--What I thought was $140 dollars, because that's what they had quoted to my boyfriend over the phone (we had been asking for months to get paper statements and they never sent us any). Well, it turns out the bill was for $145 and we got slammed with late fees because of being under by five lousy dollars. So, my boyfriend called BOA and was put on hold for almost 45 minutes. Hate. Hate. Hate.

[Kristen]

$105 bucks? Damn! You have every right to be pissed. Vent away.

[Kimmers]

Ahhhhh I hate BOA with a passion I have never felt for any other banking facility. Don't get me started on trying to use their website to make bill payments. I too have been the victim of the 10 day check hold. What kills me is that my other (tiny, local) bank has a hold policy two - freaking two days.

[Emily Allyn]

My mother works for BOA, they will most certainly take off the charges if you call. I got scammed into a magazine subscription back in college and was paying out the wazoo for magazines I didn't want, and they refunded me the money fast.

I've never had problems with them withholding direct deposit, so that confuses me...

GOOD LUCK!

[Kate]

I agree with Pam. Call customer service, if you haven't already. If they don't work, let me know. A friend of mine works at BOA up in Portland, ME, and takes care of any charges that happen.

But the point is, the charges shouldn't have been there in the first place and you shouldn't have to go through all this bullshit. It's the man trying to get you down. I hate the man...

[Cory]

mmmmmm... salted carmel hot chocolates... I'll have to try that. Oh, that's the not the point of Jen's post, it is?

[Carmen]

OMG- I thought that I was the only one being constantly screwed with no lube by the BOA.
Isn't funny how it never happens with the big checks or withdrawals like rent or electric, but the smaller ones like Walgreens and Starbucks.

[JennyW]

Sara, I'm totally with you on USAA. Granted, they don't have actualy bank branches, but they give you the ability to do absolutely everything online (including scan & deposit checks, which take exactly 3 days to process but Direct Deposits are NOT held!), they refund ATM fees each month since they don't have their own ATMs, and their customer service department is the most helpful that I have ever encountered. Jen, I highly recommend you check them out... at least see if you'll qualify. (Their insurance rates kick ass too!)

[Betty]

Jen, you guys need to find a bank who will post ANY deposits or Transfers before the Transactions. Here on the west coast Wells Fargo does just that and I have it in writing. I wonder if it's illegal that they are "holding" a direct deposit? You could always start a Class Action suit....

[Randi]

I feel your pain! My rent check was returned because they held my paycheck for 2 weeks! After almost getting evicted and threatening to file a claim (thank goodness I work for attorneys) they relented and refunded all of my fees and the manager of the local branch spoke to my landlord directly and cleared up the mess. As soon as the new rent check cleared I closed my account and moved to a local credit union.

[sue Treiber]

bank fees suck the big one!

[Kristy J]

eeesh! i have BOA and so far haven't had any issues with them, now i'm scared. maybe i get another bank?

[pam]

Jen, if you haven't called their customer service # yet, do it. If you call and complain they will remove the charges. i've done it before. they would rather keep you as a customer.

[Missie]

Banks are Satan's little outposts here on Earth.

[Smartass Milf]

Exactly why we switched to M&T. BOA sucks big time! I asked them every payday why they would hold direct deposit and out of 39 customer service reps/managers no one could give me a definite reason why.

[Kari]

Noted - I Will NEVER use BOA. Asshats!

[Emily]

Agreed. I faithfully banked with them for quite awhile, enduring their ridiculous and seemingly arbitrary fees - until they signed me up for a credit card WITHOUT MY AUTHORIZATION. Thank God they had the correct address on file, because I had no idea this card existed until I got it in the mail, awaiting activation.

The best part is that when I called, none of the asshats I talked to could even attempt an explanation of where the hell the card came from, or why it wasn't totally illegal for them to do such a thing without my consent. Awesome.

[Fran]

Holding Direct Deposits? WTF? Why in the hell would anyone bother? Oh yeah, so we don't have to go to the bank! Call them Jen, threaten to leave, let em have it!

[Sils]

This is why I have a little, tiny independent bank in Gurnee... even though I moved to Phoenix a year ago.

LAME BOA, LAME.

[HeatherPride]

I have been holding a grudge against the Skank of America for 10 years now, and have no intention of letting up any time soon.

[Julie]

Well said! I miss my LaSalle Bank. I've had nothing but trouble since BOA bought LaSalle. I am currently arguing with them about an account I closed that they show as open and frozen with a balance of $0.11!! That's right. Eleven cents. MORONS

[Christie]

They don't call them Bunch of Assholes for nothing. I worked there, it's true.

[Jessica]

Holy shit!! Our bank never holds our deposits. I can place a deposit and by the time I drive home, 5 mintues, it's there!

[Jenn]

Bank of America is the capital of Asshat.

[Sara]

We had that "holding" problem with Wells Fargo all the time! Luckily my husband is very persuasive and sweet on the phone (while I'm ranting in the background). Then I realized that because my dad was in the military we could use USAA. Now we get paid early because they don't hold it at all. Everyone should check and see if they can join USAA. Plus, you can scan your checks in and deposit them from home instantly! No holds there, either.

[Lori]

I so feel your pain. I once over drafted with another bank what started the whole damn ball was I bought a .57 lighter at the gas station and waws charged a $35 fee and it snowballed from there. UGH! The worst part????? I went to work for them the following month!

[Liz C]

Two words: Credit union.

I hate banks, B of A especially. They made hundreds and hundreds of dollars off of my daughter by tweaking their 'customer agreement' to allow those kinds of situations to occur.

Don't reward them by staying - take your bidness elsewhere!

[Amanda]

I can say I have sent these types of letters myself as well as saying worse over the phone to the representative. I hate b of a.

[Marissa]

Did you say Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate from Starbuck's? Umm...I ran in last Sunday and the barista made me a sample...I was hesitant and then bliss. They might just be THAT fucking good!

[Jennifer]

BOA did the same thing to me, today! My direct deposit is supposed to be available at MIDNIGHT Thursday, going into Friday...I'm still waiting!

[Sweet Herald]

I've been screwed by them too, more than once, and it was painful. However, I have noticed if you go inside the bank (yeah I know, who wants to go inside) and ask for the branch manager and raise a loud enough ruckus they usually will return the fees just to shut you the hell up. :D

[Jen]

Holy Crap! I just got off the phone with our blessed B of A yesterday. My husband's direct deposit was delayed a day and we got 5 overdraft charges. 5!!!! It tried to dispute it but they basically told me T.S. I despise them!

[Sean]

Yes. I feel your pain. I bank with Capital One and those bastards always mess up my deposit because their tellers can't type numbers correctly. What's in your wallet, indeed.

[rDogg87]

Banks are either at your feet or at your throat. You can't win.

[Beulah]

this happens to us all the frigging time! we hate boa

[nadine]

et tu?
arrggghhh

[DonnaB]

Jenn, Off topic. But did you see Amazon.com Best of 2008? Your listed as one of the best book videos. http://www.amazon.com/b/ref=amb_link_7849412_9?ie=UTF8&node=1239030011&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=center-4&pf_rd_r=0M464Y7N21RHHEJ47SRK&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=459154301&pf_rd_i=283155

[Krista]

I meant "HOLD them" NOT "home them"....long week and my fingers are puffy from pregnancy! So I am going to make an excuse for typos!!

Krista

[Candice T.]

Hi Jen,
I just finished reading your first book, and I absolutely loved it! I admire how you're so real as the rest of the world has lost its ability to be sincere.

Banks totally suck, especially BOA and Wachovia.
For example at BOA they apparently cannot cash a check that is issued by their bank UNLESS you have an account with them. Also at Wachovia I had a .37 charge and they REFUSED to drop the $35 check fee (even though I had 3 other ones they made money off of, the bastards.) I've had MUCH more success with credit unions, I don't even use banks at all anymore.

[Krista]

Jen,
We have had the same issues with my husbands paychecks when they are a certain amount...we have been with the same bank for 12 years, and he has been with the same company for just as long, and they would still home them. To get around it we opened a business account, and have the check deposited into there, and as soon as we get home we transfer some of the cash into the checking account. For whatever reason they do not hold the check in a business account like a personal account.

If you have already done this...then never mind, but if not ask about it with your NEW bank!

[Rachel]

I HATE HATE HATE BOA! I switched to Chase and have been happy ever since! And I get airline miles!

[Melanie]

That's horrible!! Have you called them about it? Once my bank charged me an overdraft fee when I had money in my account (I actually still had $ in after the overdraft fee), which caused me to overdraw like three more times for small charges! I'm pretty good at the whole being sweet while also being a mega-bitch thing so I got them all reversed.

If they don't do anything to fix it, you need a new bank!!! My bank offers a cash reserve option that you can dip into if you overdraw. It's $3/month, but if you overdraw once a year it pays for itself.

[Stephanie]

BOA sucks, but Wilmington Trust is suckier. There is not ONE person in the branch where I live that can tell you IF they're going to hold a check, HOW LONG they might be holding it or if you'll EVER get to actually use the money. DD or regular deposit, in state or out of state, doesn't matter, because they just look at you and shrug. I swear they make you long for BOA (I still have an account with them in NJ.)

[the governor of jennsylvania]

The worst part is they "let" you use your money that they're holding, but it's $35 per transaction. Shit, I'd rather they decline my card. I racked up something like $500 in fees for my book check because I assumed it would only be held five days.

[Phyllis]

What good is having direct deposit, if they're not going to honor it? Hmmm??? At least at Wells Fargo, if your DD is in, they might charge the fees, but then they take them back. You might want to look into that.

[Laura]

Oooohhhh Bank of America! Gah! Spit! Sputter! They are dead to me. DEAD TO ME!

[DodiM]

Next time my credit card company tries to raise my rates I'm putting YOU on the case for me!!!!